Building Strong Families
You are a Good Parent
As a caregiver of children, prioritizing their well-being is paramount. Ensuring optimal care involves:
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To be in a good place yourself
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To have tools and ideas that support your wellbeing
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To have a backup plan for bad days
Health care providers are discovering strategies and tools that support caregivers and kids, too.
Strong Families
The impact of past and present relationships is significant for all individuals. However, even in the face of adversity, there is hope. Through the implementation of effective strategies, we can cultivate strength and resilience. What does it truly entail to embody strength, resilience, and the ability to overcome adverse experiences?
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Knowing how to manage stress and use tools to help you cope
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Being able to step away from your emotions when things get hard
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Coming back after bad experiences and helping your kids do the same
Research indicates that nurturing relationships and positive parenting practices foster resilience and strength in both adults and children.
Difficult Childhood
Many adults, approximately 1 in 4, have experienced adverse childhood environments characterized by abuse or other challenges:
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Direct personal harm inflicted by others
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Witnessing violence against a parent or caregiver
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Exposure to substance abuse within the household
Such experiences, whether experienced directly or witnessed, can profoundly impact one's health, relationships, and parenting approach. It's important to recognize that nobody deserves to endure such circumstances.
Health Effects
Difficult childhood experiences can heighten the risk of various challenges for both you and your children, including:
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Perpetuating negative cycles
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Health issues like asthma, chronic pain, and obesity
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Harmful behaviors such as smoking, excessive drinking, and substance abuse
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Mental health struggles like anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts
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Harmful dynamics within adult relationships.
But adversity doesn't determine your future. You can find resilience, prioritize health, and forge a new path forward.
Above content is adapted from Connected Parents, Connected Kids produced by Futures Without Violence, www.futureswithoutviolence.org
Additional Information and Resources:
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Safe Homes, Safe Babies: Creating Futures Without Violence in English, Spanish
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A Health Care Guide for Survivors of Domestic and Sexual Violence in English, Spanish
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Everyday Magic: 16 Ways Adult Can Support Children Exposed to Violence and Trauma
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10 Fact Sheets on Children and Domestic Violence
Get Help
Emergency Assistance: 911
If you feel unsafe and require immediate assistance for yourself, your family, or someone else in a domestic crisis, contact 911 for emergency police assistance.
National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233
The National Domestic Violence Hotline offers confidential support, crisis intervention, safety planning, and referrals to agencies across all 50 states. Call 1-800-799-7233 or visit www.thehotline.org for assistance.
Report Child Abuse in Solano County: 1-800-544-8696
To report instances of child abuse or if you or your children are in danger within Solano County, call 1-800-544-8696.
Local Domestic Violence Services: Safequest Solano, Inc.
For local domestic violence services, reach out to Safequest Solano, Inc. Their 24/7 crisis line is available at 1-866-487-7233. To schedule an appointment, call 1-707-422-7345.
Family Resource Center Support
For additional information and support, contact your local Family Resource Center.
5 Protective Factors
Build Strong & Resilient Families
Protective factors are positive qualities that strengthen families, benefiting everyone, not just those facing challenges. The 5 Protective Factors framework highlights key elements crucial for the well-being and success of children and families. Español
5 Protective Factors
Maintaining Inner Strength During Challenging Times
Get Support & Give Support
3 / Parenting & Child Development Knowledge
Learn More, Parent Better
4 / Concrete Support in Times of Need
Getting the Resources You Need
5 / Social-Emotional Competence of Children
Help Your Child Manage Emotions & Build Healthy Relationships
Consider your own family dynamics alongside those of others you're familiar with. Certain protective factors may already be strengths within your family, while others may require additional support from time to time. This is a natural part of family life.
During periods of increased need, families may seek support from various sources, including extended family, faith communities, neighbors, or formal programs. Prioritizing self-care and accessing necessary assistance and information can contribute to the resilience and well-being of both you and your family.
Parental Resilience
Maintaining Inner Strength During Challenging Times
Resilience is the process of managing stress and functioning well even when things are difficult. Being resilient as a parent means:
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Taking care of yourself and asking for help when you need it
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Feeling good about yourself and hopeful about your future
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Planning for the future and for what you will do in situations that you know are challenging for you
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Not allowing stress to get in the way of providing loving care for your child
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Taking time to really enjoy your child and what you like about parenting.
Parental Resilience Tips
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Write down all the things you love to do with your child and think of ways you are going to make more time to do them.
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Identify your most challenging parenting moments and make a plan for what you will do when these moments come up.
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What helps you feel less stressed? Create a list of stress-buster activities to use on those difficult days.
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Make time each day to do one thing that you are good at.
Parental Resilience brief and action sheet
Social Connections
Get & Give Support
Parenting can be quite stressful. However, having strong relationships with family, friends, and neighbors can make these challenges easier to manage. A supportive network brings security and confidence, which in turn, helps us become better parents.
Build a strong social support system by:
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Prioritize relationships where you feel respected and appreciated.
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Embrace assistance from others and seek opportunities to reciprocate support.
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Enhance your skills in outreach, communication, conflict resolution, and other key areas critical to maintaining strong friendships.
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Expand your network to ensure a diverse range of friends and connections are available when needed.
Social Connections Tips
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Take time to reconnect with old friends. Pick up the phone or send them a text, email or card.
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Join a community group (for example, a library book club, a volunteer organization or a religious group). It can be a great way to meet new people.
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Reach out to parents who have children the same age as your own child – maybe you could even plan a play date or a school carpool group.
Social Connections brief and action sheet
Parenting & Child Development Knowledge
Learn More, Parent Better
There is no such thing as a perfect parent, but knowing what to expect does make the job a lot easier. Knowledge of parenting and child development helps us:
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Know what to expect as your child grows and how you can best help her learn and thrive.
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Use new skills to help your child be happy and healthy.
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Recognize your child’s unique needs
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Understand how to respond in a positive way when your child misbehaves.
By learning what our children need to do their best, we can give them the best start in life, enjoy parenting more and build strong, healthy families.
Parenting &
Child Development Tips
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What do you do well as a parent? Make a list of your parenting strengths.
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Write down at least one thing you want to learn about parenting each of your unique children. Next, brainstorm people who could help you learn those things.
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Make plans to sit down with the people who could help the most. Your child’s doctor and child care provider are great people to talk to.
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An important part of being a great parent is staying involved with your child’s school experiences. Make a point to have regular conversations with your child’s teachers or child care providers.
Knowledge of Parenting & Child Development brief and action sheet
Concrete Support in Times of Need
Getting the Resources You Need
All families go through tough times. However, knowing where to get help in the community can make things a lot easier.
It is important that we as parents:
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Know what help is available.
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Ask for help when we need it.
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Get what we need to keep our families healthy and safe.
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Help others when possible.
When our families’ basic needs are met, we can spend less time worrying and more time helping our children learn and develop. Have you ever felt embarrassed to ask for help? Take some time to remember how you feel when someone else asks you for help. It can be hard to be the one asking, but everyone needs help sometimes. Not only is there nothing wrong with getting help when you need it, but getting the help you need for yourself and your child is part of being a good parent.
Concrete Support Tips
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Practice being your and your child’s advocate. What are some ways you can engage with your child’s school (or another service you use) to be sure your child gets what he needs?
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Learn more about what is available in your community. Do some research online, spend some time looking at community bulletin boards at your park or the library, go visit a program that serves as a hub or connection point for community resources, or talk with other parents. You may be surprised at what is available.
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Help someone else get what they need. Helping others not only feels good, but it makes it easier for us to also ask for help when we need it.
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Don’t give up. Sometimes it is not as easy to get help as you would think. Service systems can be hard to understand and work with. It can get discouraging, so be kind to yourself
Concrete Support in Times of Need brief and action sheet
Social & Emotional Competence of Children
Help Your Child Manage Emotions & Build Healthy Relationships
Helping children develop social-emotional competence allows them to manage their emotions and build healthy relationships with their peers and adults.
As parents, the things we do to model and help our children learn these skills makes a huge difference.
We can help our children develop these skills by:
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Responding warmly and consistently to your child
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Teaching your child the words they need to express how they feel
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Allowing your child to express their emotions
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Being a role model: show your child how to be kind and how to interactpositively with other people
Social & Emotional Competence Tips
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Give your child attention for making the right choices. Be sure to notice and compliment friendly behaviors, like sharing, taking turns and being polite.
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Make a list of the things that can frustrate your child. Sit down and talk with them and make a plan for how they can respond the next time the situation happens.
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Take some time to sit down and read a children’s book with your child. Talk about how the characters are feeling throughout the story. This can help your child to learn about feelings and emotions.
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Create regular routines for checking in on how everyone in the family is feeling. Ask each family member to say the best thing that happened or something that was hard or upsetting and how they handled it.
Social and Emotional Competence of Children brief and action sheet
Material adapted from the Strengthening Families Protective Factors Framework,
Center for the Study of Social Policy
https://www.cssp.org/young-children-their-families/strengtheningfamilies